Lock Him Up! Free Printable Cross-Stitch Pattern for the Discerning Anti-Trump Crafter

Oh, joy of joys! Are you tired of your cross-stitch projects being all sunshine and rainbows? Do you long for a pattern that truly captures the essence of our times? Well, buckle up, because we’ve got the perfect design for you—a free printable cross-stitch pattern that’s as subtle as a tweet at 3 a.m. and as classy as a fast-food feast in the Oval Office.

Introducing: “Hey Trump, Make Going to Prison Great Again.” Complete with jail cell bars, because nothing says “crafting with a purpose” like stitching your hopes and dreams of justice into a piece of fabric. Who needs a cozy “Home Sweet Home” when you can have a reminder of where we all hope a certain someone will be spending his golden years?

Why This Pattern is a Must-Stitch:

1. It’s Timely! Let’s face it, the news cycle moves fast, but our collective disdain for a certain diaper-clad, hamberder-loving president is eternal. This pattern ensures your cross-stitch game stays relevant.
2. It’s Cathartic! Stitching those jail cell bars is the closest you’ll get to locking him up yourself. Every X is a tiny victory for democracy.
3. It’s a Conversation Starter! Hang this masterpiece in your living room, and watch your guests’ eyes widen as they realize you’re not just a crafter—you’re a revolutionary. Who needs small talk when you can have big feelings about the state of the world?

Materials You’ll Need:

• Aida cloth (because even your fabric deserves to be strong and resilient)
• Embroidery floss in classic prison gray and orange (or whatever colors scream “justice” to you)
• A needle (preferably sharp, just like your wit)
• A free afternoon (or several, depending on how much rage fuels your stitching)

How to Use This Pattern:

1. Print it out. (It’s free, because we believe in spreading the joy of petty crafting far and wide.)
2. Stitch it with all the passion of someone who’s had to sit through one too many incoherent rally speeches.
3. Frame it proudly next to your “I Voted” sticker collection or your shrine to Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

A Note on Sarcasm:

Let’s be real—this pattern is for anyone who’s ever rolled their eyes so hard at a Trump tweet that they briefly saw the back of their own skull. It’s for the folks who know that sometimes, the best way to cope with the absurdity of modern politics is to stab something repeatedly with a needle. And if anyone asks why you’re stitching jail cell bars, just smile sweetly and say, “Oh, it’s a tribute to law and order.”

So, what are you waiting for? Download the pattern, grab your floss, and get stitching. Because nothing says “I care about the future of this country” like a handmade reminder that accountability is always in style.

Download the Free Pattern Here: 

Happy stitching, you glorious, sarcastic bastards. Let’s make crafting great again—unlike, you know, some people we could mention.

Disclaimer: This pattern is intended for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to actual events, persons, or diapers is purely coincidental.