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Flush the Trump: A Cross Stitch Pattern for the Discerning Stitcher Who’s Over It
Oh, joy of joys! Do you wake up every morning, stretch, and think, “How can I channel my boundless disdain for Donald Trump into something creative today?” Well, my friend, you’re in luck. I’ve designed the perfect cross-stitch pattern for you. It’s called “Flush the Trump”—because nothing says “I’m done with this nonsense” like stitching a toilet with his iconic hair swirling down the drain.
Why This Pattern?
Let’s be real: if you’re reading this, you’ve probably spent the last few years screaming into the void, clutching your coffee mug, and muttering, “How is this even real life?” Well, instead of screaming, why not stitch? This pattern is the ultimate catharsis for anyone who’s ever rolled their eyes so hard at Trump’s antics that they briefly saw the back of their own skull.
The Design
The pattern features a beautifully detailed toilet (because, let’s face it, that’s where he belongs) with a swirling vortex of water. And what’s that in the bowl? Oh, just a tuft of Trump’s signature golden fluff, disappearing forever into the abyss. It’s poetic, really. A metaphor for how we all wish he’d just go away already.
The text “Flush the Trump” is elegantly stitched above the toilet in bold, sassy letters. It’s the kind of piece that will look fabulous hanging in your bathroom, your living room, or even your office (if you’re brave enough). Imagine the conversations it’ll start!
How to Use This Pattern
- Print it out. (Or don’t. Maybe just glare at it on your screen if printing feels too generous.)
- Gather your supplies. You’ll need some basic cross-stitch materials: fabric, thread (orange for the hair, obviously), a needle, and a hoop. Maybe a glass of wine for moral support.
- Stitch your feelings. Every X is a tiny act of rebellion. Every stitch is a middle finger to the chaos. Let the rhythm of your needle soothe your soul.
- Display it proudly. Hang it where it will bring you the most joy—or where it will annoy the most people. Either way, you win.
Why Cross Stitch?
Cross stitch is the perfect medium for expressing your disdain. It’s slow, methodical, and requires patience—kind of like waiting for Trump to face actual consequences for anything. Plus, there’s something deeply satisfying about creating something beautiful out of your frustration. It’s like turning lemons into lemonade, except the lemons are a former reality TV star turned politician, and the lemonade is a giant middle finger in thread form.
Final Thoughts
Look, I get it. Hating Trump is exhausting. It’s like a full-time job with no benefits and a boss who won’t stop tweeting. But with this pattern, you can channel that energy into something productive. Something tangible. Something that says, “I survived this dumpster fire, and I have the cross-stitch to prove it.”
So, grab your needle, pour yourself a drink, and let’s flush this guy out of our lives—one stitch at a time.
Download the “Flush the Trump” Cross Stitch Pattern Here:
(Note: This pattern is 100% free because charging for it would be so Trumpian.)
Happy stitching, you glorious, sarcastic rebel. May your thread never tangle, and may your stitches be as sharp as your wit.
Disclaimer: This post is intended for entertainment purposes only. If you’re a Trump supporter, this probably isn’t the blog for you. But hey, thanks for the page views!